So I was just forced to watch this morning’s First Take. A) I’ll never feel clean again B) I’m now aware that I can provoke my own beating.
Another Mega Church Implodes: The Self-Destruction of A Misogynistic, Sexist Asshole Pastor & How He’s About To Take His “Church” Down With Him [TW: Sexism, Misogyny, Objectification of Women]
Once one of America’s fastest growing churches, Seattle’s Mars Hill Church, announced this week the closing of three locations and warned that another would be closed if donations fail to increase. The church also laid off around 40 of their 100 church staff, including several pastors who had expressed public disagreement with church leaders.
Co-founded by controversial pastor Mark Driscoll, Mars Hill leaders closed two Seattle locations: one in the University of Washington area and the other in downtown Seattle. The members from these locations have been urged to go to the location in Ballard, WA. The fourth campus, Huntington Beach, CA, was informed that an increase in donations by local attenders might prevent the closing of that campus.
Driscoll is one of the best-known figures in the evangelical Christian movement in the United States. He is a long-winded preacher with a hard edge who has been accused by former Mars Hill Church pastors of being domineering and intrusive, including unwelcome comments about the sex lives of pastors and their wives. He is also accused of using the pulpit to further a cult of personality surrounding himself. As the Daily Beast wrote about him back in 2012: “He’s developed a reputation as a testosterone-oozing Calvinist bruiser who shouts down his congregation, swears from the pulpit and sometimes seems to think that if you’re not cut out for the locker room, you’re not cut out for heaven. If you’re a woman, you’d better make sure you keep your husband fed and serviced.”
The closings and layoffs come amid unprecedented opposition from former pastors and church members. On Aug. 3, between 60-70 former and current members held a demonstration outside the church. Jan Carlson attended Mars Hill Church between 2009 and 2012 and left because of problems that became clearer the longer they stayed. She said Mars Hill “engages in heavy-handed discipline through a hierarchical structure.” She added that her experience has taught her that “spiritual abuse exists,” and that one should “know what it is, and keep your eyes and ears open. When you see red flags, be willing to walk away.”
On Aug. 21, twenty-one former Mars Hill Church pastors and twenty-one other anonymous witnesses lodged a broad range of charges against Driscoll. The detailed letter also outlined concerns surrounding a contract with a consulting group to use church funds to rig the sales of Driscoll’s book with his wife, Grace, Real Marriage: The Truth About Sex, Friendship, and Life Together, in order to secure a spot on The New York Times bestseller list.
The focus of the former pastors was accusations of workplace bullying, and the creation of a culture of fear among church workers and ministers. One former member of the Mars Hill Church governing board, Paul David Tripp, called Mars Hill Church, “the most abusive, coercive ministry culture I’ve ever been involved with.”Mars Hill was “the most abusive, coercive ministry culture I’ve ever been involved with.”
Tripp delivered that assessment in a meeting with nine Mars Hill Church pastors who were still employed by the church at the time of the meeting. Then on Aug. 22, those pastors delivered a letter to their remaining fellow pastors asking Driscoll step down and enter a process of repentance and restoration. Instead of complying with the direction of his pastors, Driscoll announced to the church on Aug. 24 after his Sunday sermon that he would take “an extended focus break” in order to heal and allow the church to examine the allegations against him.
Since Driscoll announced his leave, several pastors have resigned amid criticism of how the church plans to investigate the charges against Driscoll. According to Mark Dunford, who was dismissed as a volunteer pastor from the Portland, Ore., campus, the executive elders of Mars Hill, which includes Driscoll, chose the committee that will examine the charges against him. Indeed, the committee is composed of pastors who are subordinate to Driscoll and were not elected by their fellow pastors. Dunford wrote:
…the Executive Elders (of which he [Driscoll] is one) added three additional members to the board that would adjudicate his charges and having created/restored the Board of Elders to investigate those charges. I want to be clear that the elders themselves are not involved with selecting who would serve on those boards. Again, it was the EE [Executive Elders] who made those decisions.
In addition to the recent charges involving Driscoll, the church has also been under fire for most of 2014. For instance, church leaders have failed to disclose specifics about how donations designated for church work in Ethiopia and India were spent. Instead of the donations going to international purposes, much of what was donated to the church’s Global Fund ended up being spent on expansion in the United States.
Perhaps the most crippling blow to Driscoll and Mars Hill came on Aug. 8 when the board of Acts 29 Network, an organization designed to promote the development of new churches and co-founded by Driscoll, removed Driscoll and Mars Hill Church from membership. The board asked Driscoll to resign and seek counsel.
Mars Hill Church leaders blamed bad publicity for the precipitous drop in attendance and tithes. According to church representative Justin Dean, attendance is down to between 8,000 and 9,000 from a high of 12,000 to 13,000 people. Some locations have seen attendance plummet over 70%. Donations are off in similar fashion. Due to the financial crisis, leaders of the church resorted to this week’s closings and layoffs, calling the current situation the “most serious budget challenge” in the history of the church.
Many ex-members I spoke with felt like financial matters were off limits from the laity. Former churchgoer Mark Yetman told me that financial information is “hidden” and that “questioning is discouraged and considered divisive.”
Despite the current decline of the Mars Hill, former members of the church see some lessons in the situation. Dave Lester, who attended from 2008-2011, told me, “The big takeaway lesson here is there has to be legitimate accountability for a supremely gifted leader in any organization.”
Lester, who was a community group leader while at the church, added, “The church should never be about the building of a celebrity platform for a person and the subsequent celebrity worship.”
This Republican Takes the Cake for the Worst Reaction to the Ray Rice Video [TW: Sexism, Misogyny, Violence Against Women]
Gross misogyny at its very worst.
Here is the worst response to the Ray Rice domestic violence incident yet:
Ex South Carolina Republican operative, Todd Kincannon took to Twitter on Sept. 9 to post an utterly tone-deaf reaction to the TMZ video showing NFL athlete Ray Rice knocking unconcious his then-fiancee Janay Palmer. While the Tweet has since been taken down, it wasn’t before someone took a screenshot of the tweet in which Kincannon vilifies the victim by saying that the “dumb bitch” got what she deserved for starting the whole mess.
Kincannon’s gross display of misogyny did not stop there. He decided to post more defamatory and chauvinistic statements regarding domestic violence:
In contrast to the national outcry over the Ray Rice scandal that ensued after the video’s emergence, Kincannon chose to take the road less traveled: He made light of a violent encounter.
This isn’t the first time and won’t be the last. If Kincannon’s response to brutal abuse is shocking, then don’t follow him on Twitter. The GOP troll has a history of harassing and smearing people on the social media outlet, constantly posting hateful tweets.
Back in January, Kincannon launched a sexist campaign against Sen. Wendy Davis comparing her to Monica Lewinsky and likening her to a prostitute.
Salon's Elias Isquith noted at the time, “It shouldn’t come as a surprise, then, to find that Kincannon, who regards himself as some kind of Twitter provocateur, has caused an outrage on Twitter with his latest barrage of hate-tweets. But instead of focusing his ire on Trayvon Martin, trans* people, or U.S. veterans, Kincannon has set his sights on Wendy Davis, the Texas Democrat who is currently in the midst of running her underdog campaign to become the next governor of the Lone Star State.”
Kincannon’s attacks leave no stone unturned, taking down people for being poor or liberal or for any sort of general flaw he sees in people online – his latest stunt is to take down a woman online for posting a picture that he claims show her with herpes.
The takeaway: Kincannon is full of vitriol and hate. He degraded what is at the heart of the Ray Rice domestic violence incident and has no remorse for it. Domestic violence is a serious issue layered with complexities, all of which has gone right over Kincannon’s head.
Kincannon isn’t the only GOP-member to take a poor stance on the issue. Republicans lined up to oppose the expansion of the Violence Against Women Act in 2013, which brought to light the GOP’s apathy of violence against women. Kincannon’s response coupled with the Republican indifference is a prime example of how the left’s rhetoric on the issue needs a serious overhaul.
h/t Addicting Info
Source: Jenna Kagel for News.Mic
Fox hosts giggle that NFL player’s abused girlfriend should learn to ‘take the stairs’ [TW: Sexism, Misogyny, Domestic Abuse, Domestic Violence, Trivialization of Abuse]
The hosts of Fox & Friends on Monday turned video of NFL player Ray Rice punching his then-girlfriend unconscious in an elevator into a joke, saying that in the future she should “take the stairs.”
After TMZ released a leaked surveillance video that showed what happened when Rice knocked out the woman inside the elevator, the Fox News hosts asked viewers if a two-game suspension had been appropriate.
“We should also point out, after that video — and now you know what happened in there — she still married him,” host Steve Doocy explained. “They are currently married.”
“Rihanna went back to Chris Brown right after [he assaulted her],” co-host Brian Kilmeade noted. “A lot of people thought that was a terrible message.”
“I think the message is take the stairs,” he added, as co-host Anna Kooiman giggled.
“The message is, when you’re in an elevator, there’s a camera,” Doocy concluded.
Watch the video below from Fox News’s Fox & Friends, broadcast Sept. 8, 2014.
(h/t: Sports Grid)
CeeLo Green's Disgusting Comments Prove Rape Culture Is Alive and Well [TW: Rape Culture, Rape Enablism, Rape Apologism, Victim Blaming, Victim Shaming]
Well that took an ugly turn.
When a woman comments on the Internet about the prevalence of rape culture, the backlash is often swift. And thanks to CeeLo Green’s deep-seated misunderstanding of the circumstances surrounding his own alleged sexual assault, we know that even prominent celebrities can perpetuate myths about rape, with or without understanding what they are doing.
Green, the singer-songwriter perhaps best known for his hit song “Fuck You,” drew the ire of many women’s advocates due to tweets he sent after pleading no contest to supplying ecstasy to a woman in 2012; he allegedly had intercourse with her while she was unconscious. After receiving a sentence of three years on probation and 360 days of community service (for the drug; no rape charges were ever filed), Green took to social media to tell his followers all about how he’s actually a nice guy, railroaded by critics who don’t understand what rape is.
Unfortunately for Green, his tweets, deleted since he sent them on Tuesday, but preserved in screenshots, left little doubt as to who exactly it was who didn’t understand the concept of rape.
"People who have really been raped REMEMBER!!!" he wrote in one. "If someone is passed out they’re not even WITH you consciously! so WITH Implies consent," he (erroneously) claimed in another.
There are so many damaging myths about sexual assault in those two little sentences that it’s hard to know where to start.
First of all, being with a person never implies consent. You don’t consent to anything, sexual or otherwise, simply by being in the presence of someone else. Being with someone who drugged you without your knowledge most certainly does not imply consent either.
Second, many rape victims do not remember their assault. That does not mean the rape doesn’t count. Good lord.
Following backlash online (and probably a frantic call from his publicist), Green deleted the wildly inaccurate and insensitive tweets, and his entire account, which has since been reactivated.
Unfortunately, Green’s victim-blaming beliefs about sexual assault aren’t surprising, because they aren’t new. From celebrities who sing about supposed “blurred lines" to politicians like Todd Akin who use language like “legitimate rape” to lawyers like the one in Steubenville, Ohio, who claimed that a victim’s silence implies consent, it’s clear that Green’s comments are the rule rather than the exception in our cultural reality. They point to a profound misunderstanding at every level of society of what consent actually looks like.
In a couple of days, it’s likely this entire scandal will blow over and we’ll move on to the next public figure who says something terrible about women. Green will go on to sell records and be a successful recording artist, just like many other male entertainers with histories of hurting women, from Chris Brown to Sean Penn.
Like these other well-known abusers, Green likely didn’t come up with this misguided theory about consent: He learned it. Until our culture teaches men that nothing — not your gender, wealth or fame — entitles you to female bodies, people like him will continue to believe and claim that some women are deserving of rape.
Update 09/02/2014 9:15 pm: According to UltraViolet, it took as little as three hours for after the launch of their online petition for TBS (Time Warner’s parent company) to cancel CeeLo Green’s show “The Good Life”.
Source: Elizabeth Plank for Mic
BarbWire.com's Gina Miller: "We'll End Rape Culture When Women Stop Dressing Like Strumpets, Prostitutes, And Porn Stars" [TW: Slut-Shaming, Misogyny, Rape Culture, Sexism, Enabling of Rape Culture]
BarbWire’s Gina Miller used her column today to respond to a piece on the Huffington Post asserting that what is needed is not a new nail polish for women that can detect the presence of date rape drugs in their drinks but rather a concerted effort toward “solutions to shifting rape culture where consent, on both sides, is seen as the norm.”
Miller was decidely unimpressed by the supposed need to “stop blaming the victim [and] educate men on how not to rape” because the only real solution is to get our society to turn to Jesus … plus, all those drunken sluts who are dressing like prostitutes are partially responsible for getting raped because they are sending mixed messages:
Why do you suppose that there might be a “blame the victim” mentality today? Do women ever bear any responsibility for putting themselves in potentially dangerous places and situations, like drunken frat parties? Do they bear no responsibility for the outrageous “fashions” they choose to wear nowadays, clothing that makes them look like prostitutes and porn “stars,” clothing that arguably feeds the “rape culture”? Yes, we know that a man who sexually assaults a woman is always wrong, but why is it considered just fine for a woman to present herself in a hyper-sexual, sleazy way and then expect men to treat her with the dignity and honor she imagines she deserves? The disconnect from reason is palpable.
To many on the Left, the answer to most problems is “education,” but what young man doesn’t already know that it’s wrong to sexually assault another person? Who is unclear that “no” means “no”? There again, can it be argued that a woman dressed like a strumpet, yet saying “no” to unwanted sexual advances, sends a mixed message? Yes, I know it’s outrageous, but this is what our Godless culture has wrought. There are a lot of bad people out there, and no amount of “education,” telling them it’s wrong (they already know this), will change their evil hearts.
[T]here will be no shifting of any rape culture by throwing money at more “rape culture awareness,” or telling young men that it’s wrong to rape, or holding colleges accountable, or not “blaming the victim.” Our nation has turned its back on God. We have kicked Him out of our schools and out of the public square. We have raised several generations of Godless, self-centered, sex-obsessed kids, and the truth is that there can be no positive transformation of any sick culture without the saving power of the Spirit of God through Jesus Christ to change people’s hearts of stone into new hearts of flesh.
h/t: Kyle Mantyla at RWW
Fox News host Keith Ablow defended his attack on First Lady Michelle Obama’s weight, telling Politico that it was “hypocrisy” for her to act as a “role model” on diet when she “has not been consistently a picture of fitness.”
Ablow came under fire for his comments on the August 12 edition of Fox’s Outnumbered, where he argued that Michelle Obama is not a credible voice on school nutrition because “she needs to drop a few” pounds. Even one of Ablow’s colleagues at Fox, Janice Dean, criticized his remarks, tweeting “please keep your comments about women ‘dropping a few’ to yourself.”
Nevertheless the next day Ablow told Politico that he was “not taking food advice from an American who dislikes America” and ”has not been consistently a picture of fitness”:
"I do dislike hypocrisy and I really do believe that people speaking about diet should be role models themselves, and I’m not sure if the First Lady is that role model," Ablow said in an interview.
"I’m not taking food advice from an American who dislikes America, who in many photographs during her tenure as First Lady is obviously not fit, and who has a record of saying things that show that she’s two-faced," Ablow said Wednesday. “This should be obvious, I don’t know why it isn’t.”
Ablow is standing by his commentsand saying that people “should be less sensitive about talking about [weight].”
One reason for his criticism, he says, relates to consistency.
"It happens to be the case that the First Lady during her tenure has not been consistently a picture of fitness," he said. "That’s all, it is just a fact."
When many people think of the men’s rights movement, the image that springs to mind is lonely men lurking in chat rooms and railing against women. But in recent years, a group of brash, witty female activists has taken up the cause. And some of them are emerging as the movement’s leading voices. It may seem counterintuitive that women would be helping drive the conversation about a movement that’s fighting anti-male discrimination and campaigning fiercely against feminism. But according to Dean Esmay of the men’s rights organization A Voice for Men, the fact that they shatter expectations is what makes them such good emissaries. “People want to believe we’re a bunch of sad, pathetic losers who can’t get laid and are just bitter because our wives left us,” Esmay explains. “The very presence of women in the movement creates cognitive dissonance.” Often, he adds, this dissonance makes people more receptive than they otherwise would be.
Who are these women men’s rights activists? And why do the embrace a movement that some see as blatantly misogynistic? Below is a rundown of key players. A few of them, including Janet Bloomfield, who was the focus of a recent in Vice News article, have been in the spotlight recently. Others are virtually unknown to the mainstream, but within the movement they’re seen as luminaries.
Karen Straughan: The YouTube Sensation
In late 2011, Straughan, a foul-mouthed fortysomething Canadian waitress and mother of three, sat down at her kitchen table and began ruminating about the sexes: “I keep hearing from the feminist camp that femaleness has always been undervalued. But I’ve always contended that it’s the exact opposite…If it comes down to a man and a woman in a burning building and you can only save one, the expectation is that you choose the woman every single time. So honestly, whose humanity are we placing above whose?” She then posted a video of her talk on YouTube, where it has racked up more than a million views.
Straughan, who has a brazen air and a taste for ribbed tank tops (a.k.a. “wife beaters”), has since become one of the most visible faces of the men’s rights movement. She has nearly 70,000 YouTube subscribers. Often, she says, she gets emails from men around the world who stumble on her videos and spend hours on end binge watching. The firebrand vlogger, who wrote erotic fiction as a sideline before getting involved in men’s rights, also helped launch the Honey Badger Brigade, a ragtag group of female men’s rights activists. This summer, when protesters threatened to shut down A Voice for Men’s first conference in Detroit, the Honey Badgers collected more than $8,000 in donations and flew to Motor City to act as “human shields.” The Honey Badgers also produce an online radio show, covering men’s issues and geek culture. Recent topics include false rape allegations, the treatment of military veterans, and “the shit feminists say.”
Helen Smith: The Renegade Psychologist
According to Smith, a forensic psychologist from Knoxville, Tennessee, who is married to conservative blogger Glenn Reynolds, men have had it with women and society in general. Last year, Smith published a book called Men on Strike: Why Men Are Boycotting Marriage, Fatherhood, and the American Dream—and Why It Matters, which argues that the decks are stacked against men in every sphere, from the home and workplace to the justice system (the result of sexual harassment policies and gender bias in schools and family courts). In response, many men are following John Galt’s lead and opting out of high-paid work and family life. Smith, who previously worked with violent children, also blogs about men’s issues for the conservative news and opinion website PJ Media. In a post earlier this year, she argued that “feminists and their supporters who block funding and education going to boys’ and men’s issues” may have been “to blame” for Elliot Rodger’s deadly shooting rampage in Santa Barbara last March.
Erin Pizzey: Feminism’s Bête Noire
Pizzey, a 75-year-old British author and anti-domestic-violence advocate, traces her interest in men’s rights back to her own childhood and years of brutal beatings from her mother. She later went on to found England’s first shelter for battered women. Pizzey maintains that most of the victims who sought refuge there were themselves violent. She came to believe that women deserved a share of the blame for domestic abuse and that the fledgling feminist movement unfairly demonized men by casting them as the sole aggressors. “This huge edifice of radical feminism made this about ‘patriarchy’ rather that human relationships,” she says. “In the process, it pulled the whole discussion away from the needs of people in violent families.”
Pizzey eventually began offering shelter to battered men while crusading against feminism, which she dubs “the Evil Empire.” After a bomb scare and a string of death threats, in 1979 she fled to the United States, where she helped set up domestic-violence shelters in 21 cities. She also worked with lawyers to defend men claiming they had been falsely accused of rape and domestic violence—an endeavor she funded by writing adventure novels. Pizzey later embraced nonfiction, and wrote frequently for British newspapers, such as the Daily Mail (sample headline: “Why I loathe feminism…and believe it will ultimately destroy the family”). She also traveled the world speaking to battered men’s groups. Today, she is editor-at-large of A Voice for Men, and a hero of the men’s rights movement. She feels very much in her element. “For many years, I was this lone voice, and I was hated for it,” she explains. “Now, you just don’t feel quite so lonely.”
Janet Bloomfield: The Social-Media Provocateur
Bloomfield has landed in the spotlight recently as a driving force behind Women Against Feminism, a social-media campaign featuring photos of women with scraps of paper listing their reasons for rejecting feminism. Since the week before last, when the campaign went viral, Bloomfield—a thirtysomething homemaker and doctoral candidate—has been making the network rounds, with interviews on ABC, the BBC, and NBC’s Today Show.She calls single mothers “bona fide idiots” who don’t “give a shit” about their children’s well-being and pens blog posts with titles like “Why Don’t We Have a Dumb Fucking Whore Registry? Now That Would Be Justice.”
Bloomfield, who lives somewhere in Canada (she keeps her location and the names of her three children secret to shield them from harassment), is an unlikely champion for men’s rights. In college, she studied film theory, and learned to view the world through a feminist lens. But after giving birth to her first child, she decided to stay home and was shocked by the reaction from other women. “It wasn’t so much the disdain for my choice or the idea that I wasted my education,” she says. “It was that they treated me like I was crazy to rely on my husband—as if somewhere lurking inside of him was a sex-starved monster who would toss me out like trash.” Bloomberg began trading letters with her friend, Pixie, who was camped out in the hospital after giving birth to a critically ill baby boy and believed the intensive care staff was treating the sick baby girls more tenderly. Their letters soon morphed into grumbling about the lot of boys and the treatment of stay-at-home moms.
After immersing themselves in the men’s rights blogosphere, in 2012, the pair launched the in-your-face blog, JudgyBitch.com. Bloomfield’s anti-feminist screeds, piled with obscenities and inflammatory theories about rape and domestic violence, made a splash in the men’s rights circles, and the following year she began writing for A Voice for Men, where she now manages social media. She’s also broken into mainstream news and opinion sites, including Thought Catalog, which recently published Bloomfield’s essay, “I’m an Anti-Sexist, Liberal Doctoral Student, Wife, and Mother Who Supports the Men’s Rights Movement Over Feminism, Here’s Why.”
In reality, while Bloomfield takes a progressive stand on some issues—she supports gay marriage and a women’s right to choose, for example—many of the ideas she flogs are anything but. She calls single mothers “bona fide idiots” who don’t “give a shit” about their children’s well-being and pens blog posts with titles like “Why Don’t We Have a Dumb Fucking Whore Registry? Now That Would Be Justice.” She also dismisses concept of “rape culture,” as “a giant rape fantasy—one in which all women can imagine all men desire them with such force and such passion that they’re willing to commit a crime.”
Suzanne Venker: The Traditionalist
For much of her career, Venker followed the path blazed by her aunt, the anti-feminist crusader Phyllis Schlafly. In 2011, the pair even cowrote a book, The Flipside of Feminism, arguing that freedom and power have only made women unhappy. But their paths began to diverge the following year when Venker, who in addition to authoring books is a frequent Fox News commentator, published a column on FoxNews.com called “The War on Men.” It made the case that men were opting out of marriage because career-minded women had lost their womanly qualities and become angry and competitive. And it urged women to “surrender to their nature—their femininity” if they wanted to find husbands. Predictably, the piece went viral, stirring up a whirlwind of criticism. But Venker was also flooded with grateful emails from male readers. “Men were writing to say, ‘Thank you, thank you!’” she recalls. “‘Finally, somebody gets it!’” Inspired by the outpouring, Venker launch the men’s rights blog Women for Men and shifted the focus of her own commentary to men’s issues. In her recent FoxNews.com columns, Venker argues that white men face oppression “unlike anything American women have faced,” andclaims that men’s “success in fields such as medicine, engineering and technology have done more to liberate women from the constraints of their former lives than a busload of feminists could ever hope to do.” She also maintains that surrendering to male power is an “aphrodisiac” that “grants women access to the deepest parts of a man’s soul.”
Anne Cools: The Parliamentarian
In 1969, Cools took part in a supposedly peaceful sit-in to protest racism at a Montreal university. It ended up exploding into one of the most violent student riots in Canada’s history, with protesters setting fires and tossing computers out of windows. Cools, who was sentenced to four months in prison but later pardoned, went on to found one of Canada’s first shelters for battered women. Then, in 1984, the Barbados native became the first black person ever to serve in the Canadian Senate.
According to the Globe and Mail, “Women’s groups applauded the addition of a minority firebrand to the chamber of dozy old white men.” Her belief that domestic violence was a two-way street later put her at odds with the feminist movement, but many Canadians embraced her ideas. In 1995, when Cools told an International Women’s Day gathering that “behind every abusing husband is an abusing mother,” she was inundated with grateful handwritten letters. Many of them were from people who had been abused by their mothers or men claiming they had been falsely accused of domestic violence during divorce proceedings.
Galvanized, Cools—a Liberal Party member turned independent—helped launch a parliamentary committee that traveled the country holding emotional standing-room-only hearings on child custody laws. Critics branded it the “politically incorrect committee” because it heard testimony from hundreds of men, grandparents, and second wives, who spoke tearfully about being cut off from children by a legal system that they alleged favored mothers. For Cools, who lost two siblings to childhood illness, their stories hit close to home. “I understood very early in life what it meant for parents to lose a child,” she told the National Post in the late 1990s. “I’ve always known a parent cannot recover from that. And this is why I will not tolerate the thought of any parent taking a child away from another parent.”
The committee’s final report recommended rewriting custody laws to ensure both parents access to the children and making false domestic violence allegations a crime. Despite overwhelming public support, a decade and a half later, Cools is still fighting to bring these proposals to fruition. Her dogged struggle has won her adoration in men’s rights circles—so much so that A Voice for Men invited the regal, silver-haired septuagenarian to deliver the first speech at its inaugural conference. “The cause that before you and the things that you fight for are valid and just,” Cools told the gathering. “I am on the home stretch of my public career, so you and younger soldiers must come. I encourage soldiers to arm themselves, and to put on battle gear, because it is a fight.”
How Evangelicals (and Christians With Any Dignity) Are Protesting ‘The Rush Limbaugh Of Christianity’ [TW: Sexism, Misogyny, Spiritual Abuse]
A growing number of evangelical Christians are standing up against what they say are the homophobic, sexist, and domineering ideas and practices of pastor Mark Driscoll, the influential head of the Mars Hill megachurch in Seattle, Washington.
Several dozen protestors stood outside the Bellevue, Washington campus of Mars Hill Church this past Sunday, holding signs adorned with slogans such as “Stop objectifying women” and “How many atheists will Mark Driscoll/Mars Hill make?” The demonstrators, many of whom claimed to be former members of Mars Hill, told the Seattle Post-Intelligencer that they were decrying the church’s ministerial methods, policies, and problematic theology — particularly Driscoll’s regressive teachings about women.
“I am an ex-member [of Mars Hill Church] who left a couple years ago, because my views on life and women evolved,” one protestor told the Post-Intelligencer. “I come from a Jewish family, a family with strong women. It appeared, at the church, most development attention was given to me. Women were seen as accessories in marriage.”
Rob Smith, a former program director at Mars Hill, echoed this frustration with the church’s stance on women and called for a new theology, saying, “In the church’s view, women are just objectives. They are there to please their husbands. In my theology, Jesus freed women. Jesus was surrounded by strong women.”
Sign-waving protests are a new phenomenon for Mars Hill Church, but Mark Driscoll, 43, is no stranger to controversy — or accusations of bigotry and chauvinism. He has made something of a career for being, as one protestor called it, “the Rush Limbaugh of Christianity,” building up his 17,000-member church and Acts 29 network of worship communities by delivering raunchy, sometimes obscenity-laden sermons about subjects such as “Biblical Oral Sex” and penning bestselling books with eye-catching titles such as Porn-Again Christian: A Frank Discussion on Pornography & Masturbation. He also stoked controversy in 2011 when he joked about “effeminate” pastors on Facebook, and told RELEVANT magazine in 2007 that he believed in a Jesus who has a “commitment to make someone bleed,” and that he abhorred those who revere a “hippie, diaper, halo Christ” because “I cannot worship a guy I can beat up.”
Many Christians, such as influential evangelical blogger and author of A Year of Biblical Womanhood Rachel Held Evans, have criticized Driscoll since he founded Mars Hill in 1996. Most take issue with his image of a hyper-masculine Jesus, his flippant comments deriding gay people, and his embrace of complementarianism, or the belief that men and women are designated different roles by God — namely, men are supposedly tasked with most traditional forms of leadership, whereas women are primarily responsible for rearing children.
“[Driscoll] has consistently used offensive and hateful language to speak about gay and lesbian people, spoken crassly and condescendingly about women, and exhibited scary, bullying behavior toward men who fail to conform to his rigid vision of masculinity,” Evans wrote in an email to ThinkProgress. “That he consistently models this type of bullying behavior to the young men in his church is deeply troubling.”
But while Driscoll has long frustrated many of his fellow Christians — particularly progressive Christians — recent years have seen increasingly grave criticisms lobbed against him and his church, with many coming from within his own community. In 2012, people claiming to be members of Mars Hill began reporting that Driscoll had a policy of “shunning” congregants he and his ministers saw as “unruly,” effectively bullying them into silence and submission. This added fuel to existing accusations of unsettling practices and behavior among Driscoll’s ministerial staff and even Driscoll himself, who was accused by a former Mars Hill leadership pastor of being “domineering,” “quick tempered,” “verbally violent,” and “arrogant.” Then, late last year, Driscoll was charged with plagiarizing sections of his new book, and upset many in his pews for reportedly working with a company to artificially inflate his book sales in order to make the New York Times bestseller list.
The charges against Driscoll appeared to crescendo last month, when a blogger unearthed what appeared to be more than 100 pages of sexist and homophobic comments that Driscoll allegedly posted on an online forum in 2000 under the pseudonym “William Wallace II.” The comments included a number of unsettlingly offensive rants, including postings that referred to the United States as a “pussified nation,” called gay people “damn freaks,” and responded to a female poster by saying “I also do not answer to women … If you are the pastor, quit your job and repent.” This slow-rising tide of allegations seemed to rock the church last month, when two prominent members of the church’s “Board of Advisors and Accountability” — which sets salaries for church elders and supervises various church ministries — suddenly resigned.
Driscoll attempted to address the situation in a 30-minute video posted on the Mars Hill website on July 21, but said that “a lot of [the accusers] that we are dealing with remain anonymous” and that he is “not entirely sure who they are.” The video sparked the creation of a Facebook group entitled “Dear Pastor Mark & Mars Hill: We Are Not Anonymous.” The group, which now claims almost 600 members, functions as forum where people who have been negatively impacted by Driscoll and Mars Hill can tell their stories, organize events like Sunday’s protest, and claim “I am not anonymous.”
“During a year of job loss for my family, I did not intend to have my tithe money spent to get your book on the NYT list,” wrote one group member. “Although those [embarrassing] moments have been scrubbed off the internet, I remember them. Please stop.”
The group joins with various other blogs such as welovemarshill.com and Mars Hill Refuge, websites constructed so that people claiming to be former members of Mars Hill can post accounts of how they have been hurt by Driscoll and his ministers. But the protests are about more than catharsis: According to the Post-Intelligencer, the growing gaggle of disaffected parishioners are preparing to release “50 specific new charges” against Driscoll, focusing on “allegations of outbursts and abusive conduct, and — particularly — the shunning of former church members.”
Driscoll has publicly apologized for the plagiarism accusations, and actually preemptively apologized for the internet comments in a 2006 book, where he first mentioned his former pseudonym. Some have called for the evangelical community to accept his apology, but Evans, who has been in contact with many former members of Mars Hill, was less sure.
“…I think we have to be really careful about telling victims of abuse when and how they must forgive, and we have to be especially careful that we not enable abusers to continue to abuse,” Evans said. “An apology without change is not true repentance, and we’ve heard a lot of apologies from Mark Driscoll without any discernible change.”
“I believe in forgiveness. But I do not believe in telling victims of abuse that forgiveness requires they endure it.”
Sexist Douche Pastor Mark Driscoll Believes Our Nation Is 'Pussified' [TW: Sexism, Misogyny, Douchebaggery]
You might remember swaggering, misogynist evangedouche/human Affliction tee Mark Driscoll from being terrible on Glenn Beck, being terrible on Fox and Friends, or being terrible any time he does anything ever, which is all the time. But he’s really ramped up the action in the last month or so! It seems like dude can’t open his praise-hole lately without face-planting in a big pile of PR doodoo.
You might remember swaggering, misogynist evangedouche/human Affliction tee Mark Driscoll from being terrible on Glenn Beck, being terrible on Fox and Friends, or being terrible any time he does anything ever, which is all the time. But he’s really ramped up the action in the last month or so! It seems like dude can’t open his praise-hole lately without face-planting in a big pile of PR doodoo.
The backlash against pastor Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill church is growing—and this time, it’s Christians and former Mars Hill insiders who are beginning to lead it. This Sunday, Driscoll released a quasi-apology video with a little stab at his “critics” in the church, calling them “anonymous” with the implication that they’re cowards. That kicked off the "We Are Not Anonymous" Facebook page (with comments like “Mark Driscoll you know who we are… look under the bus!”) and calls for a protest at the Mars Hill Bellevue site this Sunday.
"It’s like Romney at the party talking about the '47 percent,'" says protest organizer Jim Henderson (referring to the video capturing the presidential candidate dismissing 47 percent of Americans as idiotic freeloaders who will vote for Obama). "It’s just one of those moments when he served it up for us to hit it out of the park."
And the VERY latest: Former Mars Hill members have dug up some old posts—written pseudonymously by Driscoll—in which he declares that “we live in a pussified nation” and, by contrast, ”hell looks like a good placebecause at least a man is in charge, has a bit of order and let’s men spit and scratch as needed.”
HELL LOOKS LIKE A GOOD PLACE BECAUSE AT LEAST A MAN IS IN CHARGE.
Hahahahahahaha, crash and burn, dong-face. Thanks for confirming what we already knew about you: Faith is just a cover. Oppressing women and gay people is your real religion. You and your hate and your profit margins are your real God.
Here’s just a taste of what Mark Driscoll, “hipster pastor,” says when he thinks nobody’s looking:
We live in a completely pussified nation.
We could get every man, real man as opposed to pussified James Dobson knock-off crying Promise Keeping homoerotic worship loving mama’s boy sensitive emasculated neutered exact male replica evangellyfish, and have a conference in a phone booth. It all began with Adam, the first of the pussified nation, who kept his mouth shut and watched everything fall headlong down the slippery slide of hell/feminism when he shut his mouth and listened tohis wife who thought Satan was a good theologian when he should have lead her and exercised his delegated authority as king of the planet. As a result, he was cursed for listening to his wife and every man since has been his pussified sit quietly by and watch a nation of men be raised by bitter penis envying burned feministed single mothers who make sure that Johnny grows up to be a very nice woman who sits down to pee.
So, Johnny hits youth group one day to hear from his pussified youth pastor that he should perfect his virginity and dating skills. So Johnny tries to be a loving and patient man who looks for a nice woman like mom who will whip him into shape and beat him into submission so that he can one day join a men’s accountability group and learn how to keep his urges under control, which just causes him to be earn a B.A. in masturbation, M.A. in porno, andPhD in knuckleheadology as Johnny is now so terrified of women and his own penis that he sits in his room alone each night on the internet hoping to get some (with the occasional "falling into sin" with a woman as they inevitabaly cross "boundaries" of intimacy) because he’s so afraid of women and has no idea how to take one, or love one, or serve one, or take one to bed and make the Song of Songs sing again.
One day Johnny finally gives in to the pressure of his pre-humpers singles ministry and gets stuck with some gal left on the shelf long after her expiration date that is just like dear old mom who wants him to shut up like Adam, take his beating, and join a church men’s group that is really a woman’s group in disguise complete with cookies and crying andantidepressants to cope with the insanity.
Poor Johnny is by now so completely whacked that he’s afraid of having kids and hold off his taking on any more responsibility as long as he can because Johnny is a boy trapped in a man’s body walking around in a world of other boys all trying to keep their pee pee behind their zipper and do just like their momma told them and be good women.
And so the culture and families and churches sprint to hell because the men aren’t doing their job and the feminists continue their rant that it’s all our fault and we should just let them be pastors and heads of homes and run the show. And the more we do, the more hell looks like a good place because at least a man is in charge, has a bit of order and let’s men spit and scratch as needed. And all their whining and fighting is nothing more than furtherevidence that we are still kings and unless we do our job everyone and everything is getting screwed except Johnny (metaphorically speaking of course).
I know many of the women will disagree, and they like Eve should not speak on this matter. And, many men will also disagree, which is further proof of the pussified epidemic having now become air born and universal.
Pussified men are inarguably legion.
Nothing short of an exorcism is needed.
OKEY DOKEY, BRO. And there’s so, so much more here.
Reminder: Over ten thousand people attend services at this man’s churches. Hundreds of thousands of people watch his online sermon. Almost half a million people follow him on Twitter. If you live in the Seattle area, it’s pretty much a given that someone you know has left your social circle for Mars Hill’s promise of “cool Christianity”—which encourages members to distance themselves from non-believing friends and family.
This is what they left you for. This is Mars Hill.
Source: Lindy West for Jezebel
UPDATE: Here’s more of the controversial comments that Mark Driscoll has made.
Mark Driscoll is wrong.
Godly men stick up for people, not make fun of them.
Godly men honor women, not belittle them.
Godly men love their gay and lesbian neighbors, not ridicule them.
Godly men celebrate femininity, not trash it.
Godly men own their sexuality, not flaunt it.
Godly men pursue peace, not dismiss it.
Godly men rise above violence, not glorify it.
Godly men build up the Church, not embarrass it.
Godly men imitate Christ—who praised the gentle and the peacemakers, who stood up for the exploited and abused, who showed compassion for the downtrodden, who valued women, and who loved his enemies to the point of death.
If this Facebook status were Pastor Mark Driscoll’s first offense, it might not warrant a strong response.But Mark has developed a pattern of immaturity and unkindness that has remained largely unchecked by his church. In evangelical circles, he’s like the kid from high school who makes crude jokes at every opportunity, uses the words “gay” and “queer” to describe the things he most detests, encourages his friends to subject the unpopular kids to ridicule, and belittles the guys who aren’t “macho” or “manly” enough to be in his club.
As blogger Tyler Clark put it, “When you put out a call on Facebook for people verbally attack ‘effeminate anatomically male’ men, I find myself back in high school—shoved against a locker, with the bullies calling me a faggot.”
What we have on our hands is a bully.
And this bully is teaching the young men at his church and under his influence that bullying is an acceptable expression of “biblical manhood.”
This has to stop. As followers of Jesus, we are obligated to stick up for the least of these, especially when they are being publicly bullied in the name of Christ.
We are also obligated to use the proper channels to do so. Many have asked that Mark apologize, but he has refused. Many have written blog posts expressing their concern, but he remains defiant. It’s time to take some more practical steps:
Today I emailed Mars Hill Church to request that the elders take whatever measures necessary to stop Mark’s bullying once and for all. No more empty apologies. This behavior must change.
If you wish to do the same, here’s how:
Mars Hill Church
1411 NW 50th
Seattle, WA 98107
If you know Mark personally or attend his church, approach him as a friend and request that he get the counseling he needs to deal with this destructive pattern. Bullying is as harmful to the bully as it is to the victim.
And to turn this bad situation into something good, consider joining the “I’m Sorry Campaign" to apologize for the ways that we as Christians have harmed the LGBT community.
Mark’s bullying is unacceptable.
Stop talking about it and do something.
[Update: Mark Driscoll has responded.]
Explosive Report Uncovers Extreme Homophobia In Ohio State University’s Marching Band [TW: Anti-LGBT Bigotry, Homophobia]
Ohio State University marching band director Jonathan Waters was abruptly fired this week, following a two-month investigation of the band’s rumored hazing rituals that found he witnessed and silently approved of the deeply offensive, disgusting and blatantly homophobic conduct happening among its members. According to the report, obtained and published by Deadspin, band members kept…
Ohio State University marching band director Jonathan Waters was abruptly fired this week, following a two-month investigation of the band’s rumored hazing rituals that found he witnessed and silently approved of the deeply offensive, disgusting and blatantly homophobic conduct happening among its members.
According to the report, obtained and published by Deadspin, band members kept a physical booklet that included the lyrics to the vulgar parody “fight songs” they wrote. While many of the songs are directly inspired by the fight songs of rival schools (“Come blow us, Michigan, Our cocks are waiting for you”), some of the most vulgar songs are totally out of left field.
Take, for instance, this one called “Proud to be a Homosexual”. Set to the tune of “God Bless the USA”, the chorus reads:
And I”m proud to be a homosexual,
Where at least I can run free.
And I won’t forget the fags with AIDS,
Who gave that right to me.
And I’ll gladly bend over,and spread my cheeks,
So you may sodomize me.
The lovely “Pieces of Baritone Shit” is even more shocking:
Bite my ass and lick my balls you mother fucking queers,
Get on your knees and tell me how the megaphone fits up your mother-fucking ass YOU GAY FAGS!
Lick my balls and lube up your ass,
Anal sex gives you nasty gas.
Fuck you, you big gay fags.
You pieces of Baritone shit!
Another song, titled “Brigham Young is a Goddamn Queer”, is…well…here:
The report also reveals the disgusting nicknames given to underclassmen, almost all inspired directly by sexual acts. A female student “pretending to be a vibrating sex toy” was named “E Row Vibrator”; a male student “conducting a full-body demonstration of a flaccid penis becoming erect” was “Jizzy.”
Other names given to students included “Jewoobs,” “Squirt,” “Testicles,” “Twat Thumper,” and “Twinkle Dick.”
As expected, the news has led to media hunt in search of Waters’ all-time lows. Early this morning, Ohio State University released an audio clip of Waters “disciplining” a band member:
The public, understandably, is outraged:
This Illini fan HATES Ohio State, and this is yet more reason I HATE them.
Keith Olbermann offered up a searing monologue that highlights how women are treated generally by misogynistic fools and then linked it to the disgrace that is the NFL. Roger Goodell’s arrogant two game suspension of Ray Rice for “allegedly” punching the lights out of his girlfriend has set the intertubes a blaze. Some people became heroes like Michelle Beadle, and others became villains like Stephen A. Smith, but in the end it’s the NFL that comes out looking like the real knuckledraggers of this story.
Keith Olbermann’s segment on Ray Rice was strong, indignant TV, resonant with everyone who believes a two-game suspension for punching out a woman is a clear signal that the NFL doesn’t consider domestic violence meaningful violence.
"The message to the women who the league claims constitute 50 percent of its fan base: The NFL wants your money. It will do nothing else for you. It will tolerate those who abuse you verbally and those who abuse you physically."
ESPN Reporter Makes Ill-Advised Rant About Violence Against Women, Then Doubles Down On Twitter [TW: Abuse Apologism, Abuse Culture, Abuse Enablism, Victim Blaming, Victim Shaming, Sexism, Misogyny, Violence Against Women]
This is what is happening at ESPN right now. Stephen A. Smith offends on two different mediums.
UPDATE — 3:30 p.m. ET
While addressing the recent suspension of NFL running back Ray Rice, ESPN Commentator Stephen A. Smith made several off-putting comments about women provoking attackers.
Rice was suspended for two games after being arrested for allegedly knocking out his then-girlfriend, which led Smith to warn women not to “provoke wrong actions”:
We keep talking about the guys. We know you have no business putting your hands on a woman. I don’t know how many times I got to reiterate that.
But as a man who was raised by women, see I know what I’m going to do if somebody touches a female member of my family. I know what I’m going to do, I know what my boys are going to do. I know what, I’m going to have to remind myself that I work for the Worldwide Leader, I’m going to have to get law enforcement officials involved because of what I’m going to be tempted to do.
But what I’ve tried to employ the female members of my family, some of who you all met and talked to and what have you, is that again, and this what, I’ve done this all my life, let’s make sure we don’t do anything to provoke wrong actions, because if I come, or somebody else come, whether it’s law enforcement officials, your brother or the fellas that you know, if we come after somebody has put their hands on you, it doesn’t negate the fact that they already put their hands on you.
Smith’s colleague and ESPN reporter Michelle Beadle did not take kindly to the rant and responded on Twitter.
Smith responded to the criticism himself on Friday afternoon with a lengthy series of tweets. He apologized to Beadle, but also repeated his point about women and provoking attackers.
Beadle has responded on Twitter.
UPDATE: Smith issued another statement on Twitter saying he “sincerely” apologizes for poorly articulating his thoughts.
My series of tweets a short time ago is not an adequate way to capture my thoughts so I am using a single tweet via Twitlonger to more appropriately and effectively clarify my remarks from earlier today about the Ray Rice situation. I completely recognize the sensitivity of the issues and the confusion and disgust that my comments caused. First off, as I said earlier and I want to reiterate strongly, it is never OK to put your hands on a women. Ever. I understand why that important point was lost in my other comments, which did not come out as I intended. I want to state very clearly. I do NOT believe a woman provokes the horrible domestic abuses that are sadly such a major problem in our society. I wasn’t trying to say that or even imply it when I was discussing my own personal upbringing and the important role the women in my family have played in my life. I understand why my comments could be taken another way. I should have done a better job articulating my thoughts and I sincerely apologize.
Source: Mike Hayes for Buzzfeed
BILL MAHER IS AN ASSHOLE: Bill Maher Tweets Hamas is Like Dealing With a 'Crazy Woman' [TW: Sexism, Misogyny]
Bill Maher has opinions on the situation in the Gaza Strip and they are loaded with sexist bullshit for some reason.
Bill Maher has opinions on the situation in the Gaza Strip and they are loaded with sexist bullshit for some reason.
On Thursday, thousands of Israeli troops stormed into the region, leaving behind dozens of civilian casualties in their wake. On Wednesday, four children were killed by an Israeli missile.
Thursday evening, responding to the conflict in the region, Maher, the host of HBO's Real Time with Bill Maher and a comedian known for his outspoken stance on a variety of political and social issues (who also hosted a show called Politically Incorrect) tweeted this:
Dealing w/ Hamas is like dealing w/ a crazy woman who’s trying to kill u - u can only hold her wrists so long before you have to slap her
— Bill Maher (@billmaher) July 18, 2014
Maher is completely entitled to his opinion about the situation in that region. Agree with his stance or disagree, but no one, certainly not me is here to tell him he doesn’t have a right to take a stance.
But ‘crazy woman’? Dude. First of all, that’s an unoriginal joke that stopped being funny in 1993. Secondly, “crazy woman” is a loaded term with a fuckton of implications for women. Making a joke about hitting a woman to make a point about a country where people are being killed is just gross. It’s not just PC whining, OK? If you really want people to take your opinions about issues that are important to you seriously (as Gaza clearly is to him), how about taking a moment to extend the courtesy to other people and do the same for issues that are important to them? That’s what I don’t get in situations like this. If you want to be taken seriously as a political pundit, how can you be so dismissive in the language you use when referring to women or other marginalized groups?
But I guess it’s not about that. It’s “what shocking thing can I say at a time like this to ruffle the most feathers?” This is the second time today we’ve seen a celebrity use Twitter to make a completely inappropriate “comedic” tweet about a horrible international news story.
People on Twitter of course had immediate reactions to his choice of words. Some took issue and some showed support from him against the “PC police,” which in case anyone needs a reminder is not a real goddamn thing. As my good buddy Jamie Kilstein once put it, “the PC police aren’t real. You’re not going to go to jail. You’re just an asshole.”
@billmaher Jesus dude. People are dying as you tweet that.
— Connor Mason (@conmas) July 18, 2014
@billmaher Prepare for a ridiculous amount of “PC” backlash…
— Brendan M (@ChiBDM) July 18, 2014
@billmaher You’re a misogynist piece of shit.
— Hart Noecker (@HartNoecker) July 18, 2014
@billmaher Great metaphor, dunce.
— Kay Hanley (@kayhanley) July 18, 2014
— Rock Solid Politics (@BradCabana) July 18, 2014
— JCH (@crossland68) July 18, 2014
@billmaher oh..Bill, that ain’t right.
— jax (@jaxsaid) July 18, 2014
Image via Twitter.
Source: Rebecca Rose for Jezebel
MN GOP candidate Kihne: ‘Knocked up’ women don’t deserve dinner, dancing at their wedding [TW: Misogyny, Sexism]
A Republican candidate for a seat in the Minnesota House of Representatives is being criticized for outrageous statements about mothers-to-be she posted on her right-wing blog.
Sheila Kihne hopes to unseat state Rep. Jenifer Loon (R-Eden Prairie), who she claims is insufficiently conservative to represent the district. “People want a choice,” Kihne told Minnesota Public Radio. “I was at a point where I felt like I couldn’t vote for [Loon].”
“Don’t you think that if you’re having a baby — and you’re not married — that you should forego the shower?” she asked. “I also think that if you get married — and are knocked up — you should get married quietly. At a courthouse, at a private home.”
Kihne specifically said that there should be no dancing or dinner for prospective brides who are pregnant. She acknowledge that “I’m seen as very cold-hearted with this issue and it’s caused a couple of big arguments in my family,” but insisted on standing her ground against “the idiots in Hollywood who make it look ‘cool’ to tote a baby around sans daddy.”
In that same post, she complains that an unwed mother included a portable DVD-player on her Target registry, addressing a complaint about the “extravagant lives” of people who are below her station. On her Twitter account, she posts photographs — accompanied by outraged comments — of what she is watching on television:
Two big Harley’s & a newer model SUV in the garage of gvt-subsidized housing unit pic.twitter.com/CvAn6Gz7JQ— SheilaKihne (@SheilaKihne)May 14, 2014
Kihne bills herself as a “small-government conservative,” but is unafraid to insert herself into every aspect of a person’s life.
She wrote a book with her sister about convincing men that the woman who purchased it is “the one.” According to the “About the Author” section of The List — which promises to teach women how to convince their prospective husbands to “take 7 swift actions to secure [their] love forever” — Kihne is one of a pair of “fiery sisters who share a passion for telling other people what to do.”